Tag: Parenting

Links for the Weekend (2024-12-06)

Posted onAuthorRyan Higginbottom

Each Friday, I’ll post links to 3–5 resources from around the web you may want to check out.

We Need Advent

T. M. Suffield writes about how the waiting of Advent is just the thing we need.

Advent can help us. This is a season of darkness, focused on the second coming of Jesus. It’s a time of waiting. It’s a time to really feel the tension of living in the Between, this suspended moment between what was and what will be. The Church are a people of the Between, a people of gloaming, of the time when it’s neither night nor day, the time between the times.

You’re Exactly As Holy As You Want To Be

This article from Tim Challies is a sobering reminder of our still-being-sanctified wills. We now have the ability to resist sin, but we often put up little fight. This should not only sober us, but our unity with Christ should give us hope.

Yet that’s only partially true. There’s another sense in which each of us is exactly as holy as we want to be. How is that the case? Because there is no one who can force us to sin and nothing that can force us to fail to do whatever is righteous in any given moment. There is no one who can keep us from deriving spiritual growth and benefit from any of the circumstances of our lives. No one, that is, except ourselves. If we ever wonder who is hindering our holiness, we don’t need to look any further than the closest mirror.

Six Questions Our Children Have that Demand Answers

Here’s a look at the sorts of questions our children ask as they mature. The author provides some advice on helpful answers we can supply.

Note: Washington Presbyterian Church and the editors of this blog do not necessarily endorse all content produced by the individuals or groups referenced here. 

Links for the Weekend (2024-08-23)

Posted onAuthorRyan Higginbottom

Each Friday, I’ll post links to 3–5 resources from around the web you may want to check out.

3 Reasons Heaven Doesn’t Affect Us as Much as It Should

Cameron Cole has lost a child, so these thoughts about heaven are the fruit of going through the fire.

Heightened heavenly mindedness has given me greater contentment, provided strength to persevere in suffering, and inspired me to focus on mission and evangelism. The pain of my son’s death isn’t something I would’ve chosen, and I won’t completely outrun it in this fallen world. But the heavenward shift the Lord brought has been one of the greatest blessings of my life.

How (and How Not) to Talk with Your Kids about Sexuality

It is increasingly important for parents to talk with their children about sex. But the thought of such a conversation can cause anxiety. Here is some wise counsel.

As we think about parenting in this cultural moment, few issues are more urgent and fraught to talk about with your children than sexuality and sex. This is urgent because if you do not talk about it first, the culture certainly will; it is fraught because as our culture changes in how it understands sexuality, it has unhelpfully elevated it to a status that sexuality was never meant to hold, biblically speaking.

How One Family Navigated Smartphones and Social Media in the Teen Years

Here’s another article about parenting, though like the best articles, it has much to offer even to those who aren’t parents. Without insisting on specifics, this family reports the decisions they made and their recommendations regarding technology.

On the WPCA Blog This Week

This week on the blog we published an article I wrote called The Golden Calf Reveals the Goal of the Exodus. If you haven’t already seen it, check it out!

Note: Washington Presbyterian Church and the editors of this blog do not necessarily endorse all content produced by the individuals or groups referenced here. 

Links for the Weekend (2024-08-16)

Posted onAuthorRyan Higginbottom

Each Friday, I’ll post links to 3–5 resources from around the web you may want to check out.

The Healing Power of Confessing Sins to One Another

Lydia Kinne explains why confessing our sins to each other is such a good practice.

Our pride gets in the way of confessing seeds of sin in our hearts. We’re upstanding church members, Bible study leaders, and parents. How could we possibly have given in to that thought or secret habit? So we nod and smile in small group prayer times, asking for more patience and wisdom while skirting around the things we don’t want to admit.

Every Good Parent Will Have Regrets: Advice to My 30-Year-Old Self

Dave Harvey writes some parenting advice to his younger self and it is full of good reminders.

I didn’t realize that a child’s “seeming” lack of progress was the place where parents truly encounter God. We pray, “God, fix them!” Then God whispers back, “Yes, Dave, they’re on my list. But first let’s talk about you.” Parenting didn’t exhibit my strengths; it exposed my limitations. It revealed the dozens of places where I trusted in myself and my leadership rather than in God. Ultimately, it laid me low and revealed my self-trust. But that weakness drove me to Jesus where, in my desperation, I was able to see he had plans for my kids and power for me (2 Corinthians 12:9).

Memento Vivere

Our poem of the week: Memento Vivere, by Christina Baker. It’s a poem about her thinking after an encounter with a rose bush.

Note: Washington Presbyterian Church and the editors of this blog do not necessarily endorse all content produced by the individuals or groups referenced here. 

Links for the Weekend (2024-06-14)

Posted onAuthorRyan Higginbottom

Each Friday, I’ll post links to 3–5 resources from around the web you may want to check out.

How to Not Exasperate Your Children

Hannah Carmichael wrote a helpful article discussing ways parents often exasperate their children and then what to do when that has happened.

Spending more than 15 years counseling young adults wrestling with the ramifications of how they were parented has prompted me to think deeply about specific parenting behaviors that lead to feelings of anger and discouragement in most children. There’s a type of parenting that crosses the line from instructive and nurturing to oppressive and exasperating. And it’s important we understand the difference both because our parenting has ramifications for our children and because our parenting is a reflection of the gospel.

Don’t Be Half a Berean

Jacob Crouch looks at the example of the Bereans in Acts 17. He notes that these early Christians had two characteristics worth emulating.

When Paul went to Berea, he encountered a group of people who were “more noble” than others in their reception of the gospel. They received the word with all eagerness, and they examined the Scriptures to make sure that what Paul said was true. What a glorious account of these folks, and what a great example to emulate. I’ve loved this verse for a long time, and it has encouraged me often. But, I’ll admit, that sometimes I’ve been only half a Berean.

Monday Morning’s Cupboard

Our poem of the week: a lovely poem about hospitality by Kate Gaston.

On the WPCA Blog This Week

This week on the blog we published an article I wrote called The Sabbath Proclaims the Gospel. If you haven’t already seen it, check it out!

Note: Washington Presbyterian Church and the editors of this blog do not necessarily endorse all content produced by the individuals or groups referenced here. 

Links for the Weekend (2024-05-10)

Posted onAuthorRyan Higginbottom

Each Friday, I’ll post links to 3–5 resources from around the web you may want to check out.

Fulfilling Your Personal Definition of Happiness Is Not God’s Goal

Here’s a great reminder and explanation from Paul Tripp: God’s goal in all of his dealings with you is your holiness.

The message is consistent throughout all of these passages. God is not working to deliver to you your personal definition of happiness. If you’re on that agenda page, you are going to be disappointed with God and you are going to wonder if he loves you. God is after something better—your holiness, that is, the final completion of his redemptive work in you. The difficulties you face are not in the way of God’s plan, they do not show the failure of God’s plan, and they are not signs he has turned his back on you. No, those tough moments are a sure sign of the zeal of his redemptive love.

Social Media (and Overprotective Parents) Changed Childhood

This 8-minute video is worth your time. It distills some ideas from Jonathan Haidt’s book The Anxious Generation into a short, understandable form. It’s especially timely for parents as they consider how their children should interact with social media and opportunities apart from screens.

Judas in the Upper Room

Our poem of the week: a sonnet from the perspective of Judas at the Last Supper. This is worth some time and contemplation!

Note: Washington Presbyterian Church and the editors of this blog do not necessarily endorse all content produced by the individuals or groups referenced here. 

Links for the Weekend (2024-04-12)

Posted onAuthorRyan Higginbottom

Each Friday, I’ll post links to 3–5 resources from around the web you may want to check out.

Prioritizing Our Marriages During the Child-Raising Years

Far too often a couple’s lives revolve around their children and their marriage suffers. This article offers some good counsel.

She was a year away from all the kids being out of the house. While some look forward to this stage of life, my friend was dreading it. She and her husband had grown apart after years of focusing solely on their children. Their marriage was sustained by the distractions of football and soccer games, teen gatherings in their home, and shuffling kids to and fro. Now, the looming prospect of a quieter house with no distractions between them was unwelcome.

Try to Be More Awkward

In order to show love to others at corporate worship, Brianna Lambert wants us to embrace our awkwardness. Find out what she means!

The small greetings I hear from the men and women beside me in church remind me I’m loved. They tell me of the beauty of the fellowship of the body of Christ. They pull me out of my singular focus and remind me I’m part of something bigger—bigger even than the group of families in my small group or who share my similar life circumstances. They lift my eyes to the beauty of the diverse group of church members God has placed around me—people I want to get to know better and learn from. I wouldn’t have had the opportunity to revel in this had the people beside me stayed silent. 

What does it mean that God rested?

CCEF counselor Darby Strickland shares a video meditation on what it means that God rested. She suggests some implications this has for us as well.

Thanks to Phil A for his help in rounding up links this week.

Note: Washington Presbyterian Church and the editors of this blog do not necessarily endorse all content produced by the individuals or groups referenced here. 

Links for the Weekend (2024-03-01)

Posted onAuthorRyan Higginbottom

Each Friday, I’ll post links to 3–5 resources from around the web you may want to check out.

The Bond of Love

This article is especially appropriate for our church as we will celebrate the Lord’s Supper this coming Sunday. Keith Mathison explains the importance of the unity evident when a church takes communion.

Following Augustine, Calvin spoke of this “horizontal” aspect of the Lord’s Supper as “the bond of love.” The Supper is something that is to unite believers and encourage them to love one another. Paul tells us that Christ has only one body of which He makes us all partakers; therefore, we are all one body (1 Cor. 10:17). According to Calvin, the bread in the Supper provides an illustration of the unity we are to have. We are to be joined together, without division, just as the many grains in the bread are joined together to form a single loaf.

Talking with Kids about Gender Issues: Give Them Biblical Vocabulary

I appreciate this effort to equip parents to talk to their children about important issues of gender and sexuality.

Mom and Dad, your key priority is to love, know, and trust God and to understand how the gospel applies to our experience of gender. Christ came offering forgiveness for our sin, including rejecting His design of us as male and female. He came to draw near and heal broken hearts when gender dysphoria triggers shame, and kids feel, and are, outcast and alone. And He is near to you as you engage this vital discipleship pathway with your kids. You may be fearful and overwhelmed with this task, yet remember Jesus’ words to you, “Whatever you ask in my name, this I will do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son. If you ask me anything in my name, I will do it” (John 14:13-14).

The Idol of Competence

I suspect more of us worship an idol of competence than we realize.

The idol of competence is the desire to be perceived by others as capable. It springs from the belief that my worth is tied to my output. It’s productivity fueled by shame and fear. But if we want to do our work in a God-honoring manner, have joy while we do it, and truly serve God and man, we must disentangle our conception of productivity from the idol of competence.

Note: Washington Presbyterian Church and the editors of this blog do not necessarily endorse all content produced by the individuals or groups referenced here. 

Links for the Weekend (2024-02-09)

Posted onAuthorRyan Higginbottom

Each Friday, I’ll post links to 3–5 resources from around the web you may want to check out.

The Parenting Book Too Few Parents Read

Tim Challies encourages us to learn from the ways our fellow church members parent their children.

And yet I believe that many parents fail to read the parenting book that could make the biggest difference to their lives and families. Many neglect to give their attention to the parenting book that God has set right before them. It’s the “book” that is being written in the lives of the people in their own local church.

Why We Pulled Our Kids from Club Sports

This article is an interview with the athletic director at Dordt University about kids’ involvement in club sports. He highlights the good things about sports for children, and he offers some cautions as well.

Navigating that fine line between loving sports and idolizing sports is really hard, and that’s why we need Christian coaches and leaders to help educate families on moderation—on what is enough for their family. Certainly, we are getting no help from the culture on de-idolizing athletics, so we need to be intentional. We hear loud noises from the greater sports culture saying, “Indulge, indulge, indulge.”

Selfless Self-Control in a Selfish Society

When we think of self-control, we often think primarily of ourselves. This article explains why self-control is commanded of God’s people—to benefit others.

Godly self-control, such as we find described in Titus, is the opposite. It is about us restraining ourselves not just for our own sake but for the sake of other people. Self-control admits that, left to our own devices, we would not tend towards the interests of others but towards our own interests—and seeks to do better.

On the WPCA Blog This Week

This week on the blog we published an article I wrote called God’s Promises Are So Much Better Than We Think. If you haven’t already seen it, check it out!

Note: Washington Presbyterian Church and the editors of this blog do not necessarily endorse all content produced by the individuals or groups referenced here. 

Links for the Weekend (2024-01-19)

Posted onAuthorRyan Higginbottom

Each Friday, I’ll post links to 3–5 resources from around the web you may want to check out.

The Irreplaceable Encouragement of Intergenerational Relationships

Wow, that title is a mouthful! This article offers the experience of a woman who has been blessed by intergenerational friendships. It’s an encouragement for us to find and build those same kinds of relationships

They have faced some of the very things I fear most in life, and yet show me what it looks like to keep trusting Christ. And they do not try to pretend to do it perfectly. More than their wisdom or experience, it is their testimony of God’s faithfulness that means the most to me. I can’t get enough of it. I am still young and keenly aware of how much life is still ahead. I can choose anxiety and fear and yearn for control, or I can remember that the Jesus who has sustained these brothers and sisters is the same Jesus I trust.

Parenting Will Kill You Too (And That’s Good)

I enjoyed this article about what parenting calls us to put to death in ourselves.

And so I die daily. I repent quickly and listen slowly. I surrender seeds of self-preservation and self-promotion, letting them fall to the ground and die. And as I wait for their resurrection—a harvest of righteousness in my life and my kids—in faith I laugh. Like a burbling stream, laughter flows from childish antics and childlike jokes; laughter bubbles up at idiolects and innocent delight. Though impediments come, as I contemplate these priceless treasures I’ve been gifted, the astonished laugh of Sarah of old wells up. All really is grace. 

Stop Looking For Friends, And Start Making Them

Here’s another article about friendship. It is written with the conviction that deep friendships are often formed instead of merely found.

We all want the treasure of friendship. Of course we do. It’s treasure! We just don’t all want the process that makes the treasure look like treasure. We want to discover a hoard somewhere that someone else worked and fought for, that someone else mined and minted, and we want it all for ourselves to spend and enjoy as we see fit. Maybe that’s why we’re so lonely. We’ve charted the wrong course by hunting around forever for chests full of ready-made friendship, perfectly formed and perfectly suited to our needs and desires. The reason there’s no map for that kind of friendship is because that’s not how friendship works.

Note: Washington Presbyterian Church and the editors of this blog do not necessarily endorse all content produced by the individuals or groups referenced here. 

Links for the Weekend (2023-06-23)

Posted onAuthorRyan Higginbottom

Each Friday, I’ll post links to 3–5 resources from around the web you may want to check out.

How I Grew to Love the PCA

The PCA’s blog recently featured an article by Jamye Doerfler, a member at Redemption Hill Church in our presbytery. (Her husband, Peter, is the pastor.) Her article tells the story of growing up outside the PCA and finding her way in.

You may be wondering how a nice Reformed guy could end up with a girl like me in the first place. Peter and I met at Grove City College in Pennsylvania, which was once associated with the PCUSA but now has students of every Christian stripe. When we started dating in senior year, we had no intention of marrying. After all, he wanted to be a pastor, and I wasn’t interested in being a pastor’s wife (but that’s a story for another time). Our doctrinal differences weren’t as important as the fact that we were both committed Christians. We were out of college and living in different states when we decided to marry, so it wasn’t until then that the rubber hit the road.

2 Things the Church Must Do to Help Our Post-Christian Neighbors Trust Jesus

What does it look like to be a good neighbor who desires salvation for those nearby? This article points a good way forward.

This is what it’ll take to help our neighbors trust Jesus for salvation: faithful relational engagement over years. I long for the church in America to resource and equip Christians for that sort of long-haul witness. We need discipleship, spiritual formation, and life-on-life engagement more than we need evangelistic events or outreach meetings and strategies.

The Assignment I Wasn’t Expecting

As a college student, Andrea was ready to go to the farthest corners of the planet for Jesus. She has had to get used to the calling God has given her in her own family.

But somehow I didn’t expect it all to come down to this. With the ministry over and the children gone, to have my existence circled around the care of this man-child, “the least of these”, as Jesus described him. When I said I would go anywhere, I was imagining an exotic faraway land, not a remote town in northern Minnesota. When I said I would do anything, I imagined kingdom impact, not caring for a 30-year-old man who still refuses to change his socks.

Thanks to Maggie A for her help in rounding up links this week!

Note: Washington Presbyterian Church and the editors of this blog do not necessarily endorse all content produced by the individuals or groups referenced here.